$88.98

Earlier this year I spent $88.98.

That’s the equivalent of about 32 large hot coffees at my local Dunkin. Or 21 breakfast sandwiches. 64 donuts.

I could’ve bought a lot of breakfast, but instead I bought a website. This website.

Or, more accurately, rented. For a year.

I wrote the first real post on this website, “Reading in the New Year,” over the course of 2 days. I put immense amounts of thought into what that post would say. It just took me 1.5 minutes to reread it. (And yes, I groaned a the optimism).

Over the course of the next month and a week I made 7 more posts. In one of them I promised a new entry the next day. In the next post, two weeks later, I made fun of myself for it.

Look at me; I’m like George R. R. Martin, minus the talent.

8 posts in less than 2 months, at a cost of $11.12 a post. I could’ve had a complete Dunkin breakfast (consisting of 1 large hot coffee, 1 breakfast sandwich, and 1 donut) for each post, tax included, and still had enough left over at the end for another dozen some-odd donuts.

I got a new job recently and have started getting a coffee (sometimes more) at the Dunkin for lunch every day. I’m painfully aware of the money I’m wasting on it.

Apparently, though, I’m not as aware of the money I’m wasting on this website. As I mentioned earlier, I rent this website.

Not really; technically it’s more complicated than that with impressive jargon and whatnot. It’s easier to say I’m renting the website. And rent is due. And rent went up.

And actually, rent was due. I paid it Monday. Good news, we’re not being evicted.

At the cost of a lot of Dunkin, I paid for another year of this website.

To give credit to the lovely people who host this website, they gave me plenty of warning. Multiple warnings, actually, in the two weeks leading up to my card being charged. I did nothing about it.

I would be having a totally fine day, glance down at my phone, see the emails and panic. Day ruined.

To be clear, I kept the emails at the top of my inbox on purpose, because I knew I had to make a decision.

Regardless, seeing them would leave me languishing over the difficult question: Was I going to keep the website?

Well, you know the answer already (oops, spoilers, sorry).

I actively chose to keep the website.

One day after they had already charged me for it.

I may have misread the email.

Monday night I stumbled upon a video of Dan Harmon’s 40th birthday, where his then girlfriend Erin McGathy surprised him with readings from his book, “You’ll Be Perfect When You’re Dead,” performed by his friends. He, of course, was unaware he’d written a book.

“You’ll Be Perfect When You’re Dead” is a collection of posts from Dan’s blog, curated and published by Erin as his 40th birthday gift.

Seeing Dan react to his friends’ performances of his old writings - good and bad (some of those blog posts were almost a decade old at time of reading, 2 decades now) - made me remember the feeling of writing for this website.

Frustration. But in a good way.

Writing is something I push myself to do because I enjoy it in the same way I enjoy solving a puzzle. It’s sheer aggravation until the high kicks in.

Take that however you will.

Writing is hard. If it wasn’t, it wouldn’t feel as good when I hit a stride or look back at the product. It’s the opposite of something like scrolling on Twitter; nothing but high until you put the phone down and the aggravation kicks in. At least when I write I know I’ll have a product that will take me 1.5 minutes to read next year.

Maybe a whole 2, this post is getting long.

Am I keeping this website because, years from now, I expect to walk into a birthday party where my friends and loved ones read these posts aloud to embarrass and praise me? Well, that would be pretty cool. But no.

I’m keeping the website because I like to write. I just need to do it more often.

For now, this website is going to stay quiet. I might make one post (a mega book review catch-up) between now and the New Year, but I’m really going to consider 2023 a fresh start. Next year I hope to write more book reviews, talk more music, and get more of my thoughts assembled into sentences, paragraphs, and posts for public viewing. I’m also going to talk about some new things, like the podcasts I’m listening to and video games I’m playing.

What I’m trying to say is I’m going to keep posting stuff here.

Because this is the place where I post stuff.

<HOLD FOR APPLAUSE>

<CREDITS>

The Place Where I Post Stuff is written in front of a dead studio audience. Don’t ask how they got here, we’re not entirely sure either.